the mute expression...

(From a random blog)

Just how beautiful life becomes when you find out that someone you eternally knew as your closest friend, and the very one whom you’ve endlessly admired all your life for his intelligence turns out to be the very person you dreamt of in your subliminal thoughts and the very person who governs your concealed feelings…Like a ray of light that illuminates the walls of your heart and makes visible the things written…. Who takes you into a different space and time… makes you dwell in a state which is rather indescribable by human aptitude…

Defining this person is too awful a task for words…… but in the end that’s all I have…

Each day the realization rises to a different level and I fall for him all the more, unwarranted. Too much written in rhymes but its still not even 0.01% of what I actually wanna say. It is also about his folks, their love, their care, their support…yes, their SUPPORT without which we couldn’t’ve been as open about all this… yes, the very fact that the elders know… is a great support in itself…

I was good at expressing when I was inexperienced… the more I probe into the depth of this beauty, the more wordless I grow. Coz you can either have words or love. Try out. :P
He takes me into this mad comfort zone…. And makes me forget myself… i don’t have to feel guarded or cagey before speaking anything that comes to my mind. i can be the ME and that’s the most I can do for him… no pretence. Just like I am to myself… : )

I cant thank him enough for all that he is to me… just knowing that he’s just 15min away keeps me composed and calm.. easing me just by the certainty of his presence, putting to rest all the turbulence of mind, … what more can I ask for? I just wanna ensure him of the same from my side… but no matter how many rhymes I come up with, or words I write on this blackboard, or how many times i say it, it wont be even remotely close to the assurance that he gives me of his love forever, by the little things that he does. yet he derives it all and leaves no real need to actually express it.

I have never been THIS close to any person in all my life…even when we were friends, good friends, best friends, close friends, we were true to the relationship we shared. Never ever it occurred to me or him to think of it to be something more than what it was.. and when we knew it was “something actually more” we dint have to say it… it was mutely expressed….. and this mute expression gave a voice to all words that would have fallen short to express even with volume…

“It’s what you do to me….
Oh… its what you do to me…”

I just wanna say it to you, my Best Friend-
That… although you don’t have that dimple-icious smile you can die for… for me, yours is the sweetest one in the world…. \m/ and… its not the dimple that refines any smile… it’s the truth in your eyes that does..

I dunno why m I writing all this down ... this feeling is out of the world….. I still have your home-paper book open in fronta me.. (you know why) : ) n’ve gone through it like ten times by now…. ;) n my fellow chemical engineer, I tell you, chemistry rocks .. \m/ ;) ;) hard to decrypt for others... hehe... :)

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(bigger dramaaaa) :D :D :D hehe..

and i believe in it each time you say to me that "nothing is impossible for you,girl"... you know why do i believe in it?? because the most impossible thing has already happened to me :) - YOU!

Goodnight/day..

15-12-2009

That Somebody….

(From a random blog)


It’s been a year of eternal happiness, 365 days full of memories. Each special !!!
I say, even if I die today, it’d be with a smile. A smile so obviously spreads out on my face when I look back. The last one year has taught me so much, changed me so much.
A year of the sweet firsts. A year that incorporated in me enormous courage to face anything that life subjects me to. All this only because of one person. It makes me wonder how can one person have so significant influence on somebody’s life to this extent. And for me this person was ‘that somebody’.
That ‘somebody’ who believes in you so much that even the things, you almost know are impossible for you, feel like a cinch. That somebody, who loves you with all your mistakes. That somebody. Believe me, the day you find ‘that somebody’, life becomes an easy task, a walk in the park. And then you have infinite walks in thousands of parks :P
When you have that person in life, it’s but natural that your blog, notes, diaries, books are sooo filled with poems. I was never before so fluent in my thoughts. The song I remember even as I type this is- “Main shayar to nahi…. ” So true. :P
And what luck when that somebody is the very somebody you have admired for all your life. The very ‘somebody’ who has known you with everything that you are. Just the second self. I could not have been any luckier.
I cannot pen down each of the zillion feelings that are in my mind. All I can say is… I have never been THIS happy ever. I cherish each day spent so much that I feel it necessary to make note of it. And today I have an account of each of the 365 days in a word file. Each!
Waiting at the bus stops, getting imli after searching like 10-15shops, BEST rides to south Mumbai, needless to say, the loooong chats at marine drive, seeing a thousand times the setting sun, begging for kaju katli even when I don’t like it, wondering how useful ATMs are as they give us a chance to have walks around, clicking pics for no reason at all, feeding on the memories, talking about the future, walking in the patent style, eating pohe and wada pav, walks, talks, serious talks, journeys, movies, bike rides, car drives, dreams, fantasies, chaats, …Oh!
Now when I look back, all these cute little things seem soooo sweet. So small yet so noteworthy. I already feel like I belong to their kinfolk. Their unassuming nature, their constant love and tremendous support. I love you all already !!!
Everything said and done, there’s still more to!!
Hey my ‘that somebody’, Thankyou for every little thing that you taught me, that helped me live life with a good change. Things, little for you, but life-changing for me. Can i BE more thankful?
:)
goodnight/day!
14-12-2009

can be an innings defeat

People look at you

But with eyes blind
Your worth
And your love
Probably they’ll never find
Somebody’ll hold your hand
Paint a road map
To channel you to
The top of the hills
Unexplored and uncharted.
Confused and sad
That you have become
Whatever made this happen
Must be so horrible
And so bad.
Give life to your dreams
Lift your spirits
Time and again I repeat
Don’t give in,
It can be an innings defeat.

5th dec

Smile on your lips

A serene arch.

And the stunned eyes

Shooting swift radiant glance.

The amazement

On your face,

Leaving no chance

And allowing no space

For pretty much

Anything else.

Your word or wish,

Is my law.

There’ll be no misstep,

To you I vow.

When you held me close

Then, And even now

I feel warmth

That bars me to exist,

And nudges me to live.

Uncategorized and Untitled

I've been dozing off too late these days, exams over; reading books, cleaning room, talking excessively on phone with mom, sis and bro, or just chatting/commenting/interviewing/passive fbing..... plus, i discovered this electric heating coil in the evening, in one of my abandoned old bags.... i bought some milk powder, coffee powder in eve. And even as i write this, i m having a glassful coffee....! thereby jeopardizing the remotest of possibility of sleep...

Read 2 states... wonderful story...... well written...... more of entertainment.... u feel like u just watched a Hindi film.... Chetan Bhagat's books have always been like that....

started with Frederick Forsyth......

why m i writing down this random stuff, u may question... please bear with me coz even i dunno what i m writing... or thinking... or even doing.. or writing.. oh i cant believe i wrote it twice.. see, din't i say!

Exams are over, don't wanna talk of it, though... they are OVER !!!

Dying to go back home...i hear its chilling cold out there in a'bad [unlike Mumbai where the Mercury's Thermal Expansion or Contraction never occurs] not that i can stand low temperatures, its just that i love all my sweatshirts [:D] .... This city (mumbai) will never be subjected to such low temperatures except for exam in Cryogenics...

i m excited about the return journey for certain 'ssshhhh' reasons tooo [ ;) ] hehe...

just the journey is gonna be fun. coz all my folks there will be busy writing their exams :( and the 'sssshhh' reason will be just for a day ;(

gotto finish off license thing in any condition... [weary eyes]
gotto do project work...... [ :x ]

ufff!!! Life's a bitch, didn't i say???

Goodnight/day !!!!