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Friday, April 17, 2009

The thing called . . .

Yes, haven’t been posting much of late, blame the submission spell, not me. Submissions, the inevitable part of engineer’s making!!!

So, there are certain worries that are eating me up since last couple of weeks… 

  1. The thing called Life; dunno where is it heading to, and why.
  2. The thing called F.R.I.E.N.D.S.(the American Sitcom); its eating most of my time of submissions, the upshot of which is my incomplete submission file till the last moment!
  3. The thing called Loneliness; I’m alone since a couple of weeks,(this family where I stay as PG has gone to their native Kolkata)  and as much as I always say that it doesn’t, but loneliness does get the hell out of me!! Not that I’m afraid to stay in this 2bhk apartment, I’m of course not, but the ‘loneliness’ is taking my breath away! “Aunty, Uncle, I miss you, Come soon!!!”
  4. The thing called Responsibility; I have realized that my shoulders aren’t yet strong enough to bear any additional responsibility. Coz these people have gone, the entire flat is mine, Therefore, along with the freedom comes also the responsibility which I hate to accept. Responsibility of managing the house.
  5. The thing called IPL (Indian Premier League); which comes free packed together with our End Sem. Exams (or the other way round)! And I m gonna face a real challenge yet again, a challenge to control myself from watching it (and ofcourse Saurav Ganguly)!
  6. The thing called Captaincy of the Kolkata Knight Riders’; which has been passed on to Brendon McCullum from Saurav Ganguly! This news has taken me to rage against THE THING CALLED COACH OF THE INDIAN CRICKET TEAM!!! Why every coach has to make sure that he removes Saurav Ganguly from under Captain's hat and get a replacement???!!! First Chapell and now Buchanan!!! Both are *ssho***!
  7. The thing called Cooking; as I have to take care of myself since last couple of weeks, I tried my hand at cooking. And mind you, I’m a disaster at it !
  8. The thing called Vacations; Confused as to how to spend the vacations to get the max out of it, this being the last vacations of Engineering. Do CAT classes or a Summer-job.
  9. The thing called Friends; though I’m making new ones and great ones, there lies this little fear and guilt inside me to have lost the older and dearer ones.
  10. The thing called Time; my enemy since the time I came to this world! Its slipping away (since the time I was born)so easily without being made much use of.
  11. The thing called Realization; that Engineering will be over soon and that’d mean being exposed to a greater world now! The Realization that how much friends will be needed in this phase of life where we will all be loaded with a glut of responsibilities.
  12. The thing called Blogging; for which I dunno how much I’ll be able to squeeze out. But I certainly will coz this is something that directs my brain to a focused although for half an hour or so. Coz otherwise, my brain is un-focused!
  13. The thing called ‘The thing called’; ie this post. Its not ending and its making me grumpy and ill-tempered.
Life has become sick and tired of itself. There’s nothing that seems to make me upbeat. Not friends, not family, not nobody!!!

Makes me recollect these lines from a song by Raageshwari, one of my favourites:

Duniya mein chalo akele,
Apne ho armaan,
Apne hisse ki ho dharti,
Apna aasman.

Ambar mein udi hoon main duniya ke..

Are haan, ye duniya, ye duniya badi rasili.

 The lines seem so ideal. IDEAL??? IDEAL is only a word to describe the imaginary state of being called ‘ideal’. What we have in life is REALISM not the IDEALISM/impracticality.

Be it your Thermodynamics or Mechanics or any process or just GODDAMN ANYTHING, Have we ever reached THE IDEAL thing??? NO!

We have always lived a Real life not the Ideal. We have always lived the Approximations not the Accuracies.

Its just there to make us realize that we are not in an IDEAL world. Bloody then why is this word defined, when it doesn’t really exist!!!?? Makes me wonder, why was 0(zero) introduced when that really is the state of non-existence of anything. (But that’s totally a different debate, 0 is essential, I know) 

0 is nothing then why is it defined? Similarly, IDEAL is nothing then why is it defined? Is it to only make us extra-sure of other things that exist???

Maybe yes, coz the entire world is a Relative concept. Nothing in this world is Absolute.

The more I write, the more I realize how complex can be the structure of brain. Its hell in there! My brain is a hell! I started with something, ending with some other thing. Maybe that can make you realize the struggle that my brain is going through these days. Struggle with life and Struggle with ‘the thing called …’ Whatever!!!

 

Goodnight/day!

 

4 comments:

Unknown said...

Mon!!
You are horribly LONELY!!!

Mon said...

Yea, Neer, i m just waiting for em to return soon ..

abhishek said...

and what about the
" crazy little thing called love " ??

Mon said...

hehe..Btw, What about that??